Celebrating Fatherhood: Four Ways We Can Support the Mental Health of our Fathers

On Sunday June 16, the world celebrated Father's Day, a day dedicated to honoring, appreciating and expressing love to fathers everywhere in the world. As a result, a lot of people sent messages and gifts to their fathers in honor of Father's Day.

Unfortunately, this show of love and appreciation to fathers would not be done again until the next Father's Day.

Fatherhood is not a day's job. It comes with a lot of duties and responsibilities which sometimes take a huge toll on the mental health of fathers. So, in this blog, we will be exploring some challenges that comes with fatherhood and how we can support the mental health of our fathers.

Understanding the Challenges of Fatherhood

Fathers bear a lot of responsibilities in parenting. They bear the burden of providing financial and emotional support to their families regularly. Unfortunately, due to the stereotypes of society that men should not rely on anyone, a lot of fathers work hard at the expense of their mental health trying to meet these unhealthy expectations.

Some of the challenges of fatherhood include:

Financial Responsibilities
One of the biggest challenges of fathers come with bearing all the financial burden of their family. They pay for food, education and other family needs. The pressure to be the breadwinner at all costs causes a lot of stress and anxiety for them. In a society where men are taught not to rely on others or seek help, this responsibility can be very overwhelming.

Emotional Responsibilities
Fathers are expected to be the emotional backbone of their family at all times. They must not be scared, weak or vulnerable. This is why many men struggle to connect emotionally with their family. They have been forced by society to be 'powerful' and ‘stoic’ at all times.

Four Ways We Can Support the Mental Wellbeing of Our Fathers

Fathers always bear the burden of the provider and protector in a family and this pressure places a heavy burden on their physical and mental wellbeing.
Since men are not allowed to seek help or express their feelings, they internalize it and this impacts their mental health negatively. This also explains why incidents like suicide, addiction, alcoholism is more common amongst men. Here are a few ways we can support the mental health of our fathers:

1. Encourage them to express their feelings and emotions: Let us create a safe space in our family where fathers feel comfortable about being vulnerable and honest about their feelings and emotions.

2. Recognize and acknowledge their contributions to the family: Compared to mothers, fathers are not much appreciated for their efforts. For example, we have a lot of music expressing love for mothers but not much for fathers. So, we must try to express gratitude to our fathers and acknowledge their impact in the home.
Here are a few ways you can show appreciation to your father:
       a) Sending appreciation messages and compliments regularly.
       b) Verbally express how much you love and care for him. This is very important as many fathers do not get told how much they are loved compared to mothers.
       c) Give thoughtful gifts regularly. Don't wait till Father's day before you give gifts to your father. You can also give gifts that supports his mental health like:
3. Encourage fathers to make healthy lifestyle choices: Unfortunately, many men do not take care of their physical and mental health compared to women. We need to encourage fathers to make healthy lifestyle decisions like:
  • Eating balanced diet.
  • Regularly exercising.
  • Getting adequate sleep.
  • Stopping or reducing alcohol intake.
  • Quitting or reducing smoking.

Also, encourage them to take time to care for their mental health.

4. Offer Practical Support: This is one of the best ways to support the mental wellbeing of our fathers. By sharing responsibilities especially financial responsibilities, we can lighten their burden.

Conclusion

The mental wellbeing of our fathers and dads is very important at all times and we must always try to find ways to support their mental and overall well-being not just on Father's Day but every day.

by Sarah Agagu

How Can Employers Support the Mental Health of Their Male Employees

Studies have shown that the biggest cause of mental health issues in the lives of men is their work. This comes right before their finances and health Society's expectations have led men to think that they must be the sole breadwinner of the family and that they cannot rely on others. The efforts to bear this burden has led men to be so obsessed with their work and this has affected their physical and mental well-being negatively.
As an employer, you must understand the importance of prioritizing the mental health of your
male employees and how you can help them.

Importance of Prioritizing the Mental health of Your Male Employees

1. Creation of a Supportive and Accepting Work Environment: When your workplace prioritizes the mental health of its employees including the men, it improves their relationship with their families, partners and coworkers. This ultimately leads to a work
environment where everyone feels valued and respected.
2. Reduction of Suicide and suicidal thoughts: Research shows that the rates of suicide in men is more higher compared to women. One of the reasons for this is because men's mental health is not as talked about compared to women. As an employer, supporting the mental health of your male employees will help to reduce the incidence of suicide and suicidal thoughts.
3. Improved Work Performance: When men's mental health is prioritized, they experience higher job satisfaction and work better. They are also able to strike a healthy work - life balance which leads to higher productivity at work.
4. Gender Equality: When you prioritize the mental well-being of your male employees, you create a workplace where both genders feel valued and respected.
5. Reduction of Alcohol and Substance Abuse: When you care for the mental health of your male employees, it leads to a reduction in substance abuse and alcoholism. When these are reduced, health issues like hypertension, diabetes etc., are also significantly reduced.

How can You Support the Mental Health of Your Male Employees?

1. Through mental health trainings and initiatives tailored for men: A lot of companies offer mental health trainings and initiatives to their employees but they are usually generic and lack focus. Support the mental health of your male employees with mental health trainings and initiatives that are specifically tailored to them. This personalized approach is more effective compared to mental health trainings for everyone.
2. Educate your male employees on the importance of making positive lifestyle changes: Organize programs that teach the importance of a healthy lifestyle that supports their physical and mental well-being. These programs will teach them on how to take care of their lives and make healthy lifestyle choices such as the importance of quality sleep, physical exercise, healthy meal choices, and the negative effects of alcoholism and drug abuse.
3. Organize mental health seminars and workshops: These would educate your male employees on the importance of prioritizing their mental health and how they can do it. These programs would help men understand the negative effects that society's stereotypes of men have on their lives and families. It would also help them to recognize words and actions that supports toxic masculinity and how they can stand against it.
4. Help them to achieve a positive work-life balance: Many male employees do not understand the importance of creating a healthy balance with their work and personal life. They bring their work home and allows it to consume them. This usually backfires and affects their relationships with themselves and their family as well as their work performance. As an employer, you must try to help your male employees achieve a healthy work -life balance so they don't burn out.
How do you do this:
  • Encourage then to take time-off and take breaks.
  • Offer flexible work arrangements.
  • Set defined work hours.
  • Do not assign tasks to employees outside work hours.

5. Provide mental health resources to your male employees: Unfortunately, the mental health of men is not as documented compared to women. So, one way to support the mental well-being of your male employees is by providing them with books, articles, videos about men's mental health.

You can start a newsletter for your male employees where they receive mental health resources that creates awareness and helps them to care for their mental health.

6. Open communication: The stigma around the discussion of men's mental health must be removed.

As an employer, you must make it okay for your male employees to talk about their mental health. The best way to do this is by example. Let your male employees know that you value and respect their mental wellbeing. Avoid saying words that perpetuate toxic masculinity to your employees like 'Talk like a man' 'Even a woman works better than you' etc. This will encourage your employees to talk about their own struggles with mental health knowing they will not be judged.
Conclusion
As an employer, let your words and actions send a clear message that you care and prioritize the mental health of your male employees. In this month of June which is the male's mental health awareness month, make sure to organize workshops and programs geared towards supporting men's mental health.
For more information about how Mycarebuddy can help you and your male employees take care of their mental health, connect with us today.

by Sarah Agagu

8 Practical Steps to Support the Mental Health of the Men in Your Life

There is a stigma around the discussion of men's mental health in the society and this is due to the traditional stereotypes that men should not express their emotions or they will be deemed as 'weak'.
The support and resources that women receive to take care of their mental health is arguably more than the support given to men. This is one of the reasons why the rates at which men die by suicide is higher than women. This disheartening statistic is a reflection of the neglect that has been shown to men's mental wellbeing over the years.
June is the men's mental health awareness month and it is important that we take advantage of this opportunity to learn how to prioritize and support the mental health of the men around us.
The mental health of our fathers, partners, sons, brothers and male friends matter so we must learn how we can support them.
Here are a Few signs and Symptoms that a Man is Suffering from Mental Health Issues
1. Feeling Stressed Out or Tired: If a man is always tired or stressed out, it might not be due to physical reasons. It could also be a sign that they are suffering from a mental health issue.
2. High Levels of Anger and Aggression: Men tend to get angry or aggressive when they are depressed. This could also be a sign of distress. If a man gets angry or aggressive for no reason, it might actually be a cry for help.
3. Obsession with Work: Many men are not able to strike a proper balance between work and their personal life. They bring work matters into their personal lives and allows it to consume them.
4. Exhibiting Physical Symptoms like Sleep Problems and Headaches: When men suffer from mental health issues, they find it hard to sleep and might experience frequent headaches as well.
5. Self-Isolation: This is very common to people suffering from mental health issues. Men struggle to express their feelings or emotions when they suffer from any mental health issue. Instead, they choose to withdraw and create distance between themselves and their families.
6. Alcoholism and Drug Abuse: Substance abuse is one of the ways to tell whether a man is experiencing mental health issues. Since men are not allowed to feel, they resort to alcohol and drugs in an effort to numb their emotions and forget.
Note: These signs and symptoms are only a few of the ways to tell if a man is
suffering from any mental health issues. They also vary depending on each person.

8 Practical Steps to Support the Mental Health of the Men in your life.

1. Educate yourself: Before you can support the mental health of the men in your life, you must understand how society's expectations of men have negatively affected men's mental health. Understanding and educating yourself will guide you on how you can care for them.

2. Check up on them regularly: Unfortunately, due to gender stereotypes, men are often expected to be strong and always in control. So, even when they experience mental health issues, they are less likely to tell anyone. This is why you must intentionally check up on them. Ask about their wellbeing. Call them and let them know you care. If you discover that they are withdrawing or distancing themselves, reach out and encourage then to talk.

3. Listen without judgement; This is very important because men hardly talk about their emotions and even when they do so, it tends to be downplayed or not taken seriously. So, you must learn to listen to them. Don't laugh or mock them when they open themselves to you. Listen genuinely with care and compassion.

4. Encourage open conversations: Research has shown that men are less likely to talk about their mental well-being compared to women. So, if they want to talk about their mental health, listen and be open to such conversations. Do not make them feel embarrassed. Normalize having discussions about mental health and mental well-being around you. This is very important
especially for couples and partners.

5. Stop and reduce the use of words and actions that perpetuate toxic masculinity: There are certain words that we say to men that reinforce society's stereotypes. These words encourage men to suppress their emotions and focus on being strong and dominant
even at the cost of their mental wellbeing

Examples of such words are:
  • "Be a man"
  • "Are you a woman?"
  • “Real men don't cry'"

There are also actions that many of us subconsciously do that promotes toxic masculinity
such as:

  • Mocking men when they cry.
  • Encouraging men to be aggressive and labeling them weak when they choose not to.
  • Expecting men to be the sole breadwinner and to always bear the burden even if it is
    affecting their mental health.

Also, media and television shows that mocks men that are vulnerable must also be controlled.

6. Urge them to take time to care of themselves: Some men hardly prioritize self-care as they believe it is a sign of weakness. So, you must encourage them to take time to care for their mental, emotional and physical well-being.
Talk to them about their feelings. Encourage them to take time for their own needs. Encourage to eat healthy, let them know it's okay to relax or want to take a break. However, you must also respect their boundaries and not pressure them.

7. Be patient and supportive: Men have been fed lies on how they must be strong, independent, rely on nobody, bear the burden alone etc., since birth. You cannot expect that those views will suddenly change. What you can do is to offer consistent and patient support and encouragement. Let them know you are always ready to listen to them and offer support where
needed.

8. Encourage them to seek professional assistance: Since birth, men have been inundated with words and actions that they can only rely on themselves and cannot seek help. It is therefore very important that you help them know the numerous benefits of seeking professional help and encourage them to seek assistance from mental health professionals like therapists and counsellors.

Conclusion

The mental health of every man matters. Let us try to support and prioritize the mental wellbeing of our sons, fathers, husbands, brothers, male friends and co-workers etc.

In our actions and words, let us encourage men to always be themselves, allow themselves to feel and to never be embarrassed to ask for help.

by Sarah Agagu

6 Ways To Prioritize Your Mental Health as a Man

The month of June is men's mental health awareness month and society's attention is being brought again to the fact that men's mental health should also be prioritized just like women’s.
For years, men have struggled with expressing their feelings and talking about their mental health in order not to appear 'weak’. This toxic view of masculinity has led to many men experiencing depression and other mental health issues which they cannot or refuse to talk about. The results of this is that men hardly express their true feelings and emotions and are less likely to seek help even when they need it. As studies has shown, 44% of men are not willing to discuss their mental health. Therefore, it is very important that you learn how to take care of your mental health. In this blog, you will learn 6 ways you can take care of your mental health as a man.
1. Speak up: Whenever you are depressed or suffer from any mental health illness, do not be afraid to speak out and tell people about it. Talk to your family members, friends and family or talk to a therapist. Don't suppress your emotions or internalize it. Your mental health matters and you must treat it as so. Speak openly about your emotions.
2. Ask for help from others: Your mental wellbeing matters so you should not be shy or embarrassed to seek help from others. It is okay to depend on others. Do not try to bear the burden alone or by yourself. Learn how to rely on your family and Partner. Society's views that men should not rely on others is wrong and detrimental to your mental health.

Accept that it is okay to ask for assistance. Understand that it is okay to ask for help. Accept that it is okay to open yourself to others. Understand that it is okay to admit that you can't do it alone.

3. Learn to strike a positive work-life balance: Unfortunately, one of the leading causes of men's mental health issues is work. The need to prove themselves in line with society's expectations that men are strong, dominant and can do all things is seriously affecting the mental health of the men in our society today. This is why many are so obsessed with their work and
have allowed it to consume them at the expense of their physical and mental wellbeing. It is therefore important that you learn to take breaks from your work. Take time for your self- care. Stop trying to meet society's expectations at the risk of your own mental health.

4. Make positive lifestyle changes: A good way to prioritize your mental health as a man is to make healthy and beneficial lifestyle changes for yourself. Some of such lifestyle changes include:

  • Partaking in activities that helps you to relax like exercise, sports, meditation etc.
  • Getting quality sleep.
  • Stop or limit your use of alcohol and drugs.
  • Making healthy meal choices.

5. Cultivate healthy relationships: Surround yourself with people that truly care about your mental health. Move with people that support and respect your feelings and emotions. Move with people that validate your emotions not downplay them. Be with people that accept you and make it okay to for you to say ‘I am not fine.’
Reduce your interactions with people who say words that reflect toxic masculinity like: 'Be a man.' 'Real men don't cry.' ''African men no dey cry.'

6. Talk to a therapist: Many men do not know how to be vulnerable. They are afraid to tell others about their feelings or emotions in order not to appear 'weak'. Therefore, you may need the help of a therapist to guide you in expressing your feelings and being your most authentic self. Talking to a therapist would help you correct and overcome the effects of toxic mindsets and words you have heard for years.

Conclusion
Your mental health matters as a man. Do not allow society's expectations and stereotypes limit or stop you from expressing your emotions and seeking help. At Mycarebuddy, we are passionate about men's mental health. We are ready to listen to you and help you to take care of your mental health. Connect with us today

by Sarah Agagu